I dont know what it is about this blog I guess, its the fact that I don't feel like anybody checks it that I like so far. Like its my own little space to just... be and to vent maybe, clarify a few things to any inocent passerbys, wake myself up to any upcoming realities. Isn't this supposed to be like some matrix like, but its all set and fixed yet fluid and changing. I can't help but feel like the one who houses everybody, like the spiritual mother nature but I wont delve into the reasons for that I'll let you take it how you want. Why you reading this anyways?
Anyways, they think I've got it, their wrong. They think I've got it all figured out like its all going to magically come together their wrong, and Im concerned for them because I feel like it's not until they feel the impending doom that they all throw their eggs in my basket and try to float and see if we don't sink in all the words which have been written so far. It's not their fault. Im the one who wrote that they would create a section meant to solve the problem of overpopulation with words but I didn't expect them to resort to the whole concentration camp project, I figured they would just find a way to super impose China's population laws on America, not go awry Hitler style and just up and kill everyone.
I'm not supposed to mention that, I look like some kind of crazy- whatever their called conspiracy theorists. I don't feel like one. I feel like I'm the one who planned the whole fiasco on accident because I thought I was helping. Judas, don't make it better, right? That's BS right there; reincarnation of Judas. I'm not. Well if you didn't already think I was crazy I just had to touch on religion didn't I. Why are you still reading this?
I'm like sure I could cut my wrists and what not, seriously if you don't think Im crazy by now, but what good would that do? It'd hurt, that's all. I don't need the rush like I used to. I guess I should have known this would turn into some kind of chaotic, revealing, disturbing to some type of poetry but I have to leave it here for the sake of waking everyone up to the reality that she's in a position destined from the begginning to be a failure. She's destined to be hated, destined to be overthrown from a position she's not really in control of anyways. What you didn't know? She's not the queen, she never was, that was just a bunch of satan worshippers wearing her face as a mask. People probably went for it because she was such a good girl. She really is, theres no way one can just simply fall into such a position of power and be yanked out of their perfectly normal life just to lead a nation to heaven just to be overthrown by a bunch of immortals who'll believe anything they see and hear like they have ever tasted truth. Like they could ever imagine being one of the people who they sit on in this cement matrix they've got us all twisted into. Not to be rude. I do love them, their natural diamonds, but ouch, they don't know just what it is their doing to us. Social darwinism is like releasing a house cat into the woods and expecting it to turn into a tiger. Good luck kitty, try not to choke on the mouse fur.
Where am I going with this? Isn't there some moment where I get to say that one final note that blows everything out of proportion and satisfies me but throws off everybodies perspectives? Do I ever get to get away with making a jab at the people who've been making jabs at me like i'm so oblivious, like I'm so stupid. Like I somehow found myself in this position like I didn't need to sink or swim when the words pulled me into it and told me I was some chick named Circe who everybody hated, to find out I'm the one they've been watching like "Lookie who's headed the wrong way home." I'm like do you know everything that's written? No, only she's allowed to know who's in the drivers position as she's surrounded by a bunch of devils whose only goal is to watch her lose because for whatever reason seeing her win would mean everybody wins, which apparently is something we need to fight. I'm not even saying everyone needs to win, I'm just saying lets just at least feed and house them, they don't even have to see heaven, just let their sufferring be ended. We're all children inside, take care of the children.
What are your priotities, what are your boundaries? How many boners does it take to realize she's not the one in control, and she never was. If she was do you think everyone would hate her? Why does she have to spell it out for everyone what the truth really is, why is she the only one allowed to see. No wonder she thinks shes crazy, she is she, not allowed to be I, just her, and this is her jumping out at you saying everything is not alright. She needs help. Yeah sure she'll soothe you and tell you everything is going to be alright but that's just her making the ride more comfortable. Because you don't even wanna know what's in store if you dont help her. Why should you care? It doesn't affect you. No, if it did I don't think you would be reading this. Bottom line is no, she's not anything easy to understand. She's deaf, blind, mute, and smart, that's about it. The rest is for her to witness and everybody else to find out.
But of course we all know by now, it's never too late. And surprise is the doorway to heaven.
